Here it is!!!!

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PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS BOOK, not worth the time

 

There are no mistakes. The events we bring upon ourselves, no matter how unpleasant, are necessary in order to learn what we need to learn; whatever steps we take, they’re necessary to reach the places we’ve chosen to go.

That’s what learning is, after all: not whether we lose the game, but how we lose and how we’ve changed because of it and what we take away from it that we never had before, to apply to other games. Losing, in a curious way, winning.

Anyone you want to keep in your life - never take them for granted!

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This was a concert featuring Ustad Zakir Hussain (Tabla) and Pandit Shiv Kumar (Santoor). It lasted for 2 hours and felt like 2 miutes. The music was heavenly. Started off with a solo by Shiv Kumar and then Zakir Hussain joined in with his Tabla. We were requested not to take any pictures but the scene will always stay in mind. Shiv Kumar on center stage, Hussain to his right facing sideways. I could not believe his humility and he did not even utter a single word. It looked like he was a die hard fan of Shiv Kumar. All in all, they were a great team and it was nice combo of tabla and santoor. Even the fine tuning of the instruments before the performance started was very melodious. The music was astoundingly mesmerizing.

I was exhilarated.

Thank you U of A, Tucson.

A wonderful book that cannot be put down until finished.

Vroom was my favorite character. He says things like:

Think abouth this: The people who gave birth to me can’t stop hating each other. What does that tell you about me? Half my genes must be fighting with the other half. No wonder I am so fucking messed up.

Bakshi would be the most horrible boss anybody could have.

 

A defintie read. I especially like the God factor added with a logical turn at the end notes.

My God is right, the only One.

Why is it then I am not "better" than the sinner is?

Maybe God is testing me…

to see if I do my best,

my best to kill the sinner.

 

My government is right.

Bordering country is unbelievable.

I am patriotic and willing to give,

give my life and take that of many others,

in order to make my flag fly higher.

 

I do not believe in my self-will.

To make sure I am not confused,

I have to be the only existent.

 

 

I am wrong.

I am wrong.

All I want to do is love.

Love is God,

Love is right,

Love is being respectful, unconditionally.

 

I  may win,

I may lose,

But life is definitely a game.

A game where ends and means are not always related.

A game where outcome is unimportant.

Integrity of the players makes life valuable.

Whether I like it or not, I am in the field.

I will not devalue life, the opportunity that cannot be taken for granted..but nurtured.

 

My God is right, and the only One.

Why is it then I am not Better,

but the sinner is?

Maybe God is testing me…

to see if I do my best,

best to love and forgive.

Better yet, not to judge.

 

My government is right.

Bordering country is unbelievable.

I am patriotic and willing to give,

give  all to meet midway.

Better yet, find a way to peace and joy.

 

I do not believe in my self-will.

To make sure I am not confused,

Let me be humble,

Better yet, see the OTHER SIDE!!!

 

 

 

My Entry to this week’s  

Russian literature awes me in its description and the way words fall in a line, mostly like how I think in Tamil and not how I am taught to write in English. Ever since I read Jhumpa Lahiri’s Namesake, I’ve thought of reading Gogol. The final push was when I requested Tolstoy’s Kingdom of God is Within You (The book  that gave Mahatma thoughts on realizing non-violence in addition to Bhagavad Gita) and PPLS has ordered it just for me:) AND I am 154th in line for The Last Lecture, REALLY!!!!

The story is about a government document copier, Akaky Akakievich. All that he ever cared about was his job, not what his co-workers thought of him, social life, or family. Then one day, he is in need of an overcoat. After months of planning and budgeting, he gets a new one and the whole world notices him. As he begins to enjoy the coat, he encounters thieves who take it away. His attempts to find it are a waste in his corrupted country. One official yells at him cruel enough to make Akaky sick and die.

But, he comes as a ghost and teaches a lesson to the citizens of St. Petersburg.

Gogol’s words are ordered very logically in place, if you can understand what I mean. The words are just how a non-native English speaker thinks. I enjoyed the wordiness, description of places, people, emotions brought out in this short story. I lived in various characters myslf. St.Petersburg, now Leningrad, was brought alive in Gogol’s creation and reminded of many cities I have been in. Government’s inefficiency and corruption portrayed in 1842 is still true in most places of the world, discouraging as it is.

Somehow, we all can see ourselves in tiny bits in the various characters in this shortstory.

Somehow, every city is partially described in this too, and so are all emotions.

Dostoyevsky was right in saying We have all come from under THE OVERCOAT.

All the questions I have on God, Socialism, and a variety of other issues have obviously risen in Tolstoy’s mind too. And, he has written these short stories for people like me who have a lifestyle that will not accomodate reading long essays. I liked every story in this collection.

1. The Son of a Thief: Only God can judge others, we only have the right to forgive and love.

2. The repentant Sinner: If you ask for forgivance, God will will forgiv you, no matter what. I found this a little against my own philosophy and faith, according to which you reap what you sow.

3. The Archangel Gabriel: Means of worship is not as important as the heart that does it.

4. The Prayer: "Why pray to God if he can do such terrible things?" I have asked this question a zillion times and have even questioned the presence of God. but now I think, Tolstoy was correct in this story…We humans can never understand the masterplan and it is not right for us to question the happenings of life, just give it our best.

5. The Poor People: poor fisherman’s family with a daily struggle to feed 5 kids adopts 2 more neighbor’s children when they are orphaned. Are they really poor? No.

6. A coffeehouse in the city of Surat: My favorite. People from different religion fight about one true God.

7. Kornei Vasiliev: Story of Cheat, forgivance, repentance.

8. A grain of rye, the size of a chicken egg: Work is worship

9. The Berries: I did not read it. know not why.

10. Stones: Confess our sins no matter how small they are. Like a sculptor of your own statue, keep hipping away the sins.

11. The Big Dipper: charity is great.

12. The power of childhood: An accused is freed as the society cares not to create an orphan.

13. Why did it happen:

14. Divine and Human: Same situation between 2 people brings out different outcomes, based on ego & belief. The one who storngly believes in an ideal while reducing self to zero becomes divine. Whereas, the other, leader of the first is a mere human due to denial.

15. Requirements of love: it is UNCONDITIONAL.

16. Sisters: I do not understand why Tolstoy thought prostitutes need to be treated like sisters…

A Dream is not what you see in sleep, a dream is what does not let you to sleep.

- APJ Abdul Kalam

11th President of India

Pilot - "Folks, we have reached our cruising altitude now, so I am going to switch the seat belt sign off. Feel free to move about as you wish, but please stay inside the plane till we land … it’s a bit cold outside, and if you walk on the wings it affects the flight pattern."

And, after landing: "Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."

More at http://www.101funjokes.com/airplane-jokes.htm

A worldwide survey was conducted by the! UN. The only question asked was:
‘Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food
shortage in the rest of the world?’

The survey was a huge failure, In Africa they didn’t know what ‘food’
meant, In India they didn’t know what ‘honest’ meant,
In Europe they didn’t know what ’shortage’ meant, In China they didn’t
know what ‘opinion’ meant,
In the Middle East they didn’t know what ’solution’ meant, In South
America they didn’t know what ‘please’ meant,
And in the USA they didn’t know what ‘the rest of the world’ meant!

 

 

Entry to NaBloWriMo

"it did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were questioned by life-daily and hourly. Our answer must consist , not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibilty to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual."

 

Viktor E Frankl is a world war 2 concentration camp survivor, psychologist by profession. This book discusses how meaning is very important to living life, especially at times when it looks like you are just waiting for a dishonorable death. The above passage says that life does not come with a meaning but we have to give life a meaning by our true actions. For the same set of factors in life, every individual will make a different meaning and this meaning can never be the same for any 2.

Sufferings are part of life. The sooner we accept it and deal with it, better our life will be. Personally I believe, it is through the hard times during sufferings that character is strongly forged.

 

Entry to      DISCOVERIES

I knew her when she was more mature,

I heard from many that

she was quite short-tempered in her youth,

she used to be the tit-for-tat type.

In that case,

 it is even more amazing to imagine the personal struggle

 she must have gone through

to make herself a work of art, towards improvement.

She was love personified, ever forgiving,

sympathetic towards the cynics,

empathetic to the sufferings of the less fortunate.

She had the tenacity and persistence to follow her dreams.

Most importantly, she was able to endure when things did not go her way.

She was always there for her family and friends,

always thought of the footprints she left behind,

careful not to hurt another soul or the planet.

She was always trying to perfect herself as a fellow human.

She loved her family but often found difficulty expressing it.

She was involved in a detached way.

He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much; Who has enjoyed the trust of pure women, the respect of intelligent men and the love of little children; Who has filled his niche and accomplished his task; Who has never lacked appreciation of Earth’s beauty or failed to express it; Who has left the world better than he found it, Whether an improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul; Who has always looked for the best in others and given them the best he had; Whose life was an inspiration; Whose memory a benediction.

Other books I have read that have led up to this: Eat, Pray, and Love; The Way of the Heart; Life of the Beloved.

I have realized the value of silence and agree with Confucius that Silence is the friend that never betrays. I can write an entire blog on this alone.

This book starts with a quote from Meister Eckhart "Nothing in all creation is so like God as silence." I came to the same conclusion at Mexico, am I smart or what

Some lines I liked:

Suffering:

Through the practice of silence we become aware

of our pain. The pain is always there in our minds

and in our bodies. Silence allows us to see it,

 face it, release it.

We constantly judge ourselves.

Our mind decides what our experiences should be or should not be -

relentlessly labeling things good or bad -

demanding that our lives conform to our labels.

Then,when pain comes into our lives

-and it does to every life - we do not only suffer it,

but we suffer our suffering as well.

We add the mind’s harsh judgment of pain

to our actual experience of it.

 

By practicing silence, we may discover the ways

in which we intensify our pain by judging it.

Then we have a chance to become less harsh,

more forgiving.

….

By cultivating silence, we can find and release

deeper and deeper levels of pain and so discover

once again what is beneath the pain:

the natural joy that is already inside us,

free to rise and flow into expression.

Between Osama and Carly I have read a few more books about Bill Clinton (Giving), Barrack Obama (Audacity of Hope), Neil Armstrong (A Giant Leap), Einstein and a non-fiction by Nelson Demille (Wildfires). The only one I was close to blog about was Wildfires, it had a strange view on Iraq war and was written with humor.

I like reading biographies  and auto-biographies because people interest me. I picked Carly because I was eyeing it sometime ago and now I had a chance to read it. I wanted to know what would a labeled loser like her have to say? How will she be able to self-portray her public-perceived flaws? How does she make peace with the society that hated her? It does take a lot of courage and perspective. I will also definitely give you my word, along the same lines I will read GWB’s book as soon as he writes(??).

The book was a short one, a quick read. I learnt so much about her and how the media was focusing on her looks and gender instead of her performance. All leaders have to pay a price, Carly paid it to press. While her decision of the HP-Compaq merger was highly criticized, there are a lot who believe it laid the foundations for HP to perform better than Dell after she left HP itself. Sometimes, timing is everything. I don’t know if she was a great leader or not, but she was honest and candid, qualities I admire, which ex-CEOs of TYCO, ENRON, and WORLDCOM and Larry of Oracle don’t possess. Even if she did make a stupid decision, the court itself decided in 2002 it was not based on corruption on her part. She did what she truly believed in.

Some excerpts I liked &/or agree with:

My boss was absolutely right (on not taking a hard job), and it was why I wanted to go. It was brand-new. Every one was trying to figure it out. Maybe I could help. It was chaotic - maybe that would be exciting. It was difficult work - I wanted a challenge. It didn’t bother me that it wasn’t a typical move. I was looking for interesting work where I could make a real difference.

xxxx

That night, after I’d cried long enough, I made a decision. I would not cry again over others’ prejudice. Sure, what people thought or said about me might hurt. What people did to me might hurt as well, but I would not carry their narrow-mindedness or bias as my burden…I would accomplish all I was capable of. I would concentrate on doing what I believed were the right things for the right reasons to the best of my ability. Some, perhaps even many, might believe I couldn’t or shouldn’t , do what I chose. That would be their problem, not mine. They would not wound me again. I had decided once that my life was my own. Now I decided my heart would be my own as well.

…since 1986 I have saved my tears for more important things: my family, the beauty of nature, Beethoven, a dear friend, the goodness of people, their wisdom, their tragedies or their triumphs.

xxxx

I love to watch the sun rise and the sun set. I take comfort in the everyday event and feel wonder knowing that it will never be the same. I love the slower, natural cadence of my life. i love to fall asleep at night and awake when I choose. I love to do something on the spur of the moment…I love to spend a day, as I am today, in the company of children with nothing particular to do and nowhere particular to go.

I believe I have been blessed all my life. I feel blessed today - blessed to have had the opportunities and the experiences…

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Parties of last year’s end bring warm memories.

New year resolutions have been upheld successfully so far.

Friends have been kind enough to drag me out of career routine.

Picnics, art museums, boating, cricket, just sweet nothing hangouts…

TRULY BLESSED I AM…Thank you for sharing your lives with me.

 

Entry for: http://totallyoptionalprompts.blogspot.com/2008/04/totally-optional-prompt-is-late-spring.html

A Kuchipudi dance drama performed by students of Kuchipudi Kalakshetra [www.kuchipudikalakshetra.com] on Feb 10, 2007, stole the hearts of hall overflowing audience. The thunderous claps at the end of each act, and the standing ovation at the conclusion is one of a kind I have ever experienced in this part of the world for an art from the opposite part.

As an unspoken Indian tradition, the program that was supposed to begin at 5.30 p.m. had not yet started till 6.30. Overhearing a performer’s parent that the length of the program will consume well over 3 hours started throbbing my temples. I have not been very comfortable of Garland downtown or driving in the dark.  Since this is the first time I was taking my daughter to an Indian dance performance, I was at Garland’s Granville Arts Center at 5.00pm, to provide her an opportunity to mingle with performers backstage. Seeing these kids blow gum with the traditional costumes of a divine art made my heart cringe. My ever accompanying friend, Sowmya’s absence made it even worse. To sum it up, by 6.15, I had decided to leave in an hour.

In the dark, suddenly, there it was, when I least expected it, closing my eyes to ease my headache.  Asha Nairs voice going over Maha Ganapathi. I have to make it clear here, my daughter has been taking Carnatic voice lessons to appease me. Listening to the music with her on my lap, made us both drifth to the ether [no exaggeration]. My headache was beginning to dissolve.

The program began with an invocation to Ganesha [pollaiyaar, kollakattai as my daughter wud say ] with Vakratunda Mahakaya. It was obvious the dancers were Students, not Masters. But, being in this country for over 9 years, I duly  appreciate all of these kids’, their parents’ and Guru’s hours of practice, patience, and attitude to perfect a not so easy art with limited resources. My daughter was enthralled. All the brightly colored silk saris, sparkling jewels, makeup [I have to mention, was wonderful unlike some performers who use rouge like a clown’s face]. Their Shelangai sound in unison, Wow!!! Sanju & I were picking out our favorite apparels [forgive the amatuer critics that we are]. I was explaining how these dancers are pretending to do puja by pretending to pick flowers, tossing on God’s Murti, aarti etc. By the end of the evening, she started getting the idea of pretense in dance dramas… hooray!

Next dance was Murugan Kautvam, there was Senthamizh song in the air, and I was glad not to miss out the connotation of the song. In earlier days, South Indian artists learnt all regional languages to perfect their output. Following that was a dance sequence for Pundit Ravi Shankar’s Tarana. As soon as I heard Ravi Shankar, I started applauding distinctly in the audience, reminding me of my school days. It was ensued by Raravenu Gopabala. Awesome, in a nut shell.

Finally, Menaka Viswamitra was enacted in 3 acts, Indra’s Court, Forest and Tapas Impedence. All the scenes were done by Professionals. Menaka was performed by the school’s director  - Ms. Padma Sonti. Seeing her dance reminded of CM Ms. J. Jayalalitha in black and white movies. Similarly developed face communicated well without spoken words.

The stage settings were done greatly for temple, forest, Indra’s court, et cetera. Considering the efforts to bring them from a faraway country, hats off to  Kuchipudi Kalakshetra.

Conclusion:

1. $10 well spent.

2. Look forward to future events from this school.

Regrets:

Wish I could have stayed longer to take pictures with Menaka and Viswamitra per my daughter’s wish, but it was too late, that too in Garland Downtown, Yikes.

This book, written by Yann Martel, has won many literary awards, including the Booker Prize. Yann Martel is a Canadian traveler who has visited India a couple of times. I read the book as a substitute to "Looming Towers," which I have reserved as the 31rst person in Plano Public Library at this point.

Contrary to my intuition, and people who are planning to read this might want to stop precisely at this point, Pi is the name of the main Character. He defines faith, belief, love, and strength. Most importantly, describes God, accurately.  This person is from India, the sacred land that gave birth to me.  There are so many instances I could recognize with Pi. His acceptance of all religions and curiousity towards spirituallty is all a part of establishing individuality during the Teen years.

The greatest gift of believing in God / divine power is just that: Belief.

Without faith and belief, nothing can be accomplished.

An Excerpt:

I must say a word about fear. It is life’s only true opponent. Only fear can defeat life. It is a clever, treacherous adversary, how well I know. It has no decency, respects no law or convention, shows no mercy. It goes for your weakest spot, which it finds with unerring ease. It begins in your mind, always. One moment you are feeling calm, slef-possessed, happy. Then fear, disguised in the garb of mild-mannered doubt, slips into your mind like a spy.  Doubt meets disbelief and disbelief tries to push it out. But disbelief is a poorly armed foot soldier. Doubt does away with it with little trouble. You becom anxious. Reason comes to do battle for you. You are reassured. Reason is fully equipped with the latest weapons technology. But, to your amazement, despite superior tactics, and a number of undeniable victories, reason is laid low. You feel yourself weakening, wavering. Your anxiety becomes dread…

…Quickly you make rash decisions. You dismiss your last allies: hope and trust. There, you’ve defeated yourself. Fear, which is but an impression, has triumphed over you.

The matter is difficult to put into words. For fear, real fear, such as shakes you to your foundation, such as you you feel when you are brought face to face with your mortal end, nestles in your memory like a gangrene: it seeks to rot everything, even the words with which to speak of it. So you might fight hard to express it. You must fight hard to shine the light of words upon it. Because, if you don’t, if your fear becomes a wordless darkenss that you avoid, perhaps even manage to forget, you open yourself to further attacks of fear because you never truly fought the opponent who defeated you.

While reading this, I was mildly reminded of my fav Tom Hanks performance in Castaway. However, it was evident once again that the pen is mightier than the silver-screen and, Spielberg’s direction.

It has been alleged that this work is Plagiarized. I care not, as long as it serves my purpose.